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Pull in corrections from Free/OpenBSD.

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mjl 2003-05-08 14:53:08 +00:00
parent 0c737a5345
commit d6bcb9629a
3 changed files with 19 additions and 241 deletions
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6
games/fortune/datfiles/limerick
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@ -48,3 +48,9 @@ Who smiled as she rode on a tiger;
With the lady inside,
And the smile on the face of the tiger.
%
A wonderful bird is the pelican.
His mouth can hold more than his belican.
He can take in his beak
Enough food for a week.
And I'm darned if I know how the helican.
%

252
games/fortune/datfiles/limerick-o.real
View File

@ -17,7 +17,7 @@ I am not I, I'm a tree."
And covered his pants leg with pee.
%
A beautiful belle of Del Norte
Is reckoned disdainful and haughrty
Is reckoned disdainful and haughty
Because during the day
She says: "Boys, keep away!"
But she fucks in the gloaming like forty.
@ -53,13 +53,7 @@ Was heard to confess in her cups:
Was diddling a collie-
But I got a nice price for the pups."
%
A broken-down harlot named Tupps
Was heard to confess in her cups:
"The height of my folly
Was fucking a collie --
But I got a nice price for the pups."
%
A burleyque dancer, a pip
A burlesque dancer, a pip
Named Virginia, could peel in a zip;
But she read science fiction
And died of constriction
@ -145,13 +139,7 @@ A clever young man named Eugene
Invented a jack-off machine.
On the twenty-third stroke
The fuckin' thing broke
And beat both his balls to a creame.
%
A clever young man named Eugene
Invented a jack-off machine.
On the twenty-third stroke
The goddam thing broke
And beat both his balls to a creame.
And beat both his balls to a cream.
%
A cocksucking steno named Beeman
Remarked as she swallowed my semen :
@ -244,12 +232,6 @@ Got along with a sexy young sophomore.
But he found that the sophomore'd got off more.
%
A doctoral student from Buckingham
Wrote his thesis on cunts and on fucking'em.
But a dropout from paree
Taught him Gamahuchee
- so he added a footnote on sucking 'em.
%
A doctoral student from Buckingham
Wrote his thesis on cunts and on fucking'em.
But a dropout from paree
Taught him Gamahuchee
@ -339,18 +321,6 @@ Scientifically played with himself,
He labled it: son,
And filed him away on a shelf.
%
A geneticist living in Delft
Scientifically played with himself,
And when he was done
He labled it: son,
And filed him away on a shelf.
A gentleman, otherwise meek,
Detested with passion the leek;
When offered one out
He dealt such a clout
To the maid, she was down for a week.
-- Edward Gorey
%
A gentleman, otherwise meek,
Detested with passion the leek;
When offered one out
@ -401,12 +371,6 @@ Was said to be great in the sack.
Put girls in a coma
And two gave them epileptic attacks.
%
A graduate student named Zac
Was said to be great in the sack.
An inch of his boner
Put girls in a coma
And two gave them epileptic attacks.
%
A greedy young lady from Sidney
Liked it in up to her kidney,
Till a man from Quebec
@ -487,12 +451,6 @@ Once had an affair with a ghost.
The poor ectoplasm
Cried, "Goodie, I feel it ... almost."
%
A hearty young fellow named Yost
Once had an affair with a ghost.
At the height of the spasm
The poor ectoplasm
Cried, "Goodie, I feel it... almost."
%
A hidebound young virgin named Carrie
Would say, when the fellows got hairy :
"Keep your prick in your pants
@ -598,12 +556,6 @@ To revise her existence misspent.
Where she stayed through the following Lent.
-- Edward Gorey
%
A lady while dining at Crewe
Found an elephant's whang in her stew.
Said the waiter, "Don't shout,
And don't wave it about,
Or the others will all want one too."
%
A lady, while dining in Crewe,
Found an elephant's whang in her stew.
Said the waiter, "Don't shout
@ -665,12 +617,6 @@ Once rode through the streets in the nude.
Agnificent bottom"
And slapped it as hard as they could.
%
A lovely young maid from St. Jude
Once rode through the streets in the nude.
The police cried, "Whatam--
Agnificent bottom"
And slapped it as hard as they cude.
%
A lusty young maid from Seattle
Got pleasure by sleeping with cattle;
Till she found a bull
@ -895,24 +841,6 @@ Was raped in a pasture by seven
And such is the Kingdom of Heaven.
%
A pretty young lady named Vogel
Once sat herself down on a molehill.
A curious mole
Nosed into her hole --
Ms. Vogel's ok, but the mole's ill.
%
A pretty young lady named Vogel
Once sat herself down on a molehill.
A curious mole
Nosed into her hole --
Ms. Vogel's okay, but the mole's ill.
%
A pretty young lady named Vogel
Once sat herself down on a molehill.
A curious mole
Nosed into her hole-
Ms. Vogel's ok, but the mole's ill.
%
A pretty young lady named Vogel
Once sat herself down on a molehill.
A curious mole
Nosed into her hole --
@ -1099,12 +1027,6 @@ Went down on her beau in the garden.
Don't swallow that mess "
And she replied, "Ulp, beg your pardon?"
%
A sweetheart named Teresa Arden
Went down on her beau in the garden.
He said, "Good lord, Tess,
Don't swallow that mess!"
And she replied, "Ulp, beg your pardon?"
%
A systems programmer named Sprotic
Found his software intensely erotic.
In jealous distress
@ -1129,12 +1051,6 @@ Called te umpire blind out of malice.
The team made eight hits
And a girl in the bleachers named Alice.
%
A team playing baseball in Dallas
Called the umpire blind out of malice.
While this worthy had fits
The team made eight hits
And a girl in the bleachers named Alice.
%
A teenage protester named Lil
Cried, "Those watergate spies make me ill
First they bugged our martinis,
@ -1203,13 +1119,6 @@ She used it for many a bunt.
It took twenty-two men and a big Stillson wrench,
To get the thing out of her cunt.
%
A water pipe suited miss Hunt;
She used it for many a bunt.
But the unlucky wench
Got it caught in her trench ---
It took twenty-two men and a big Stillson wrench,
To get the thing out of her cunt.
%
A weary old lecher named Blott
Took a luscious young blond to his yacht.
Too lazy to rape her,
@ -1240,18 +1149,6 @@ Was to keep her late husband on ice
I'll never defrost him!
Cold comfort, but cheap at the price."
%
A wonderful bird is the pelican.
His mouth can hold more than his belican.
He can take in his beak
Enough food for a week.
And I'm darned if I know how the helican.
%
A wonderful bird is the pelican.
His mouth can hold more than his belican.
He can take in his beak
Enough food for a week.
I'm darned if I know how the helican.
%
A wonderful tribe are the Sweenies,
Renowned for the length of their peenies.
The hair on their balls
@ -1465,12 +1362,6 @@ Could, when feeling euphoric,
Three kinds of erection-
Corinthian, ionic, and doric.
%
An architect fellow named Yoric
Could, when feeling euphoric,
Display for selection
Three kinds of erection-
Corinthian,ionic,and doric.
%
An ardent young man named Magruder
Once wooed a girl nude in Bermuda.
She thought it quite lewd
@ -1501,12 +1392,6 @@ Once painted his ass like a Dahlia.
The colour - devine,
The scent - ah, that was a failia.
%
An artist who lived in Australia
Once painted his ass like a Dahlia.
The drawing was fine,
The colour - divine,
The scent - ah, that was a failia.
%
An eager young hacker named Gus
Once buggered a VAX Unibus.
The hardware went bad,
@ -1732,13 +1617,6 @@ Fan would giggle and show off her knees;
And weep from a sense of unease.
-- Edward Gorey
%
Augustus, for slpashing his soup,
Was put for the night on the stoop;
In the morning he'd not
Repented a jot,
And next day he was dead of the croup.
-- Edward Gorey
%
Augustus, for splashing his soup,
Was put for the night on the stoop;
In the morning he'd not
@ -1765,13 +1643,6 @@ When he sits on the foot of my bed;
But for the seventeen years he's been dead.
-- Edward Gorey
%
Each night Father fills me with dread
When he sits on the foot ofmy bed;
I'd not mind that he speaks
In gibbers and squeaks,
But for the seventeen years he's been dead.
-- Edward Gorey
%
From deep in the crypt at St. Giles
Came a bellow that echoed for miles.
Said the rector, "My gracious,
@ -1810,12 +1681,6 @@ Complacently stroking his madam,
For on all of the earth
There were only two balls -- and he had 'em.
%
In the garden of Eden lay Adam,
Complacently stroking his madam
And loud was his mirth
For on all of the earth
There were only two balls and he had'em.
%
In the little French town of Le'Beau,
Lived a maiden exceedingly droll.
At a masquerade ball,
@ -1859,13 +1724,6 @@ You must keep her in close quarantine,
Disorderly, drunk, and obscene.
-- Morris Bishop
%
The limerick is furtive and mean;
You must keep her in close quarantine,
Or she sneaks to the slums
And promptly becomes
Disorderly, drunk, and obscene.
-- Morris Bishop
%
The old archeologist, Throstle,
Discovered a marvelous fossil.
He knew from its bend
@ -2041,12 +1899,6 @@ Who got laid by a big alligator.
'Cause after he laid her, he ate her.
%
There once was a girl from Madras
Who had such a beautiful ass -
It was not round and pink
( as you bastards think )
But had two ears, a tail, and ate grass.
%
There once was a girl from Madras
Who had such a beautiful ass -
It was not round and pink
(As you bastards think)
@ -2252,17 +2104,11 @@ Pa followed the pair to Pawtucket,
"You're welcome to Nan."
But as for the bucket, Pawtucket.
%
There once was a man from Nantucket,
Whose cock was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin,
As he wiped off his chin,
If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it!
%
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin,
"If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."
"If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it!"
%
There once was a man from Racine,
Who invented a screwing machine.
@ -2295,12 +2141,6 @@ Who canoed with a girl in Bermuder.
So McGru took an oar and subduder.
%
There once was a man named McSweeny
Who spilled lots of gin on his weeney
So just to be couth
He added vermouth
And slipped his best girl a martini.
%
There once was a man named McSweeny
Who spilled some raw gin on his weeny.
Just to be couth,
He added vermouth,
@ -2527,12 +2367,6 @@ Whose prick was much like a ballon.
She thought she was pregnant too soon.
%
There was a gay countess of Bray,
And you may think it odd when I say,
That in spite of high station,
Rank and education,
She always spelled cunt with a 'k'.
%
There was a gay countess of Bray,
And you may think it odd when I say,
That in spite of high station,
Rank and education,
@ -3145,12 +2979,6 @@ Who wanted to dance in the ballet.
When she kicked off her drawers,
But her hair and her bush didn't tally.
%
There was a young girl named Saphire
Who succumbed to her lovers desire.
She said, "It's a sin,
But now that it's in,
Could you shove it a few inches higher?"
%
There was a young girl named Sapphire
Who succumbed to her lover's desire.
She said, "It's a sin,
@ -3464,11 +3292,6 @@ Who claimed she had men on her brain.
It was not on her brain that he'd lain.
%
There was a young lady from Munich
Who had an affair with a eunuch.
At the height of their passion
He dealt her a ration
%
There was a young lady from Munich
Who had an affair with a eunuch.
At the height of their passion
He dealt her a ration
@ -3855,12 +3678,6 @@ Who was known to the public as "Jez."
She excelled at (so everyone says).
%
There was a young lady of Gaza
Who shaved her cunt bare with a razor.
The crabs, in a lump,
Made tracks to her rump -
This passing parade did amaze her.
%
There was a young lady of Gaza
Who shaved her cunt bare with a razor.
The crabs, in a lump,
Made tracks to her rump -
@ -3969,7 +3786,7 @@ As her bridegroom got into the bed,
You can get up my bottom instead."
%
There was a young lady whose cunt
Could accomodate a small punt.
Could accommodate a small punt.
Her mother said, "Annie,
It matches your fanny,
Which never was that of a runt."
@ -3986,12 +3803,6 @@ The cheeks of her ass were so fat
Whenever she farted,
And also whenever she shat.
%
There was a young lass from Surat.
The cheeks of her ass were so fat
That they had to be parted
Whenever she farted,
And also whenever she shat.
%
There was a young laundress named Wrangle
Whose tits tilted up at an angle.
"They may tickle my chin,"
@ -4112,12 +3923,6 @@ Whose cock was so long he could suck it.
And saw his own ass,
And broke his neck trying to fuck it.
%
There was a young man from Nantucket
Whose cock was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin,
While wiping his chin,
"If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."
%
There was a young man from New Haven
Who had an affair with a raven.
He said with a grin
@ -4216,12 +4021,6 @@ Who was able to bounce either ball,
Which earned him the plaudits of all.
%
There was a young man named Crockett
Whose balls got caught in a socket.
His wife was a bitch
So she threw the switch,
And Crockett went off like a rocket.
%
There was a young man named Crockett
Whose balls got caught in a socket.
His wife was a bitch,
Yeah, she threw the switch,
@ -4568,16 +4367,7 @@ There was a young poet named Dan,
Whose poetry never would scan.
When told this was so,
He said, "Yes, I know,
It's because I try to put every possible syllable into that
Last line that I can."
%
There was a young poet named Dan,
Whose poetry never would scan.
When told this was so,
He said, "Yes, I know.
It's because I try to put every single
syllable into the last line that I possibly,
possibly can."
It's because I try to put every single syllable into the last line that I possibly, possibly can."
%
There was a young royal marine,
Who tried to fart "God Save the Queen".
@ -4585,12 +4375,6 @@ Who tried to fart "God Save the Queen".
Out came only guano
And his britches weren't fit to be seen.
%
There was a young sailor from Brighton,
Who remarked to his girl, "You're a tight one."
She replied, "'Pon my soul,
You're in the wrong hole;
There's plenty of room in the right one."
%
There was a young sailor from Brighton
Who said to his bird, "You're a tight'un."
She replied, "'Pon my soul,
@ -4898,13 +4682,7 @@ And secretly finger his dong.
There was an old man of St. Bees,
Who was stung in the arm by a wasp.
When asked, "Does it hurt?"
He relied, "No, it doesn't.
I'm so glad that it wasn't a hornet."
%
There was an old man of St. Bees,
Who was stung in the arm by a wasp.
When asked, "Does it hurt?"
He relied, "No, it doesn't.
He replied, "No, it doesn't.
I'm so glad that it wasn't a hornet."
-- W.S. Gilbert
%
@ -4927,12 +4705,6 @@ Whose prick was remarkably short.
"That isn't a prick; it's a wart!"
%
There was an old man of the port
Whose prick was remarkably short.
When he got into bed,
The old woman said,
"This isn't a prick; it's a wart!"
%
There was an old man of the port
Whose prick was remarkably short.
When he got into bed,
The old woman said,
@ -4948,7 +4720,7 @@ There was an old man with a beard
Who said, "It is just what I feared!
Two owls and a hen,
Four larks and a wren
Have all built their nests in my beard!"
Have all built their nests in my beard!"
%
There was an old person of Ware
Who had an affair with a bear.
@ -5106,7 +4878,7 @@ They had come in the fugue to the stretto
When a dark, bearded man from a ghetto
Slipped forward and grabbed
Her tresses and stabbed
Her to death with a rusty stiletto.
Her to death with a rusty stiletto.
-- Edward Gorey
%
Though his plan, when he gave her a buzz,
@ -5142,7 +4914,7 @@ I think they have rotted the drums."
%
To bear offspring, Noah's snakes were unable.
Their fertility was somewhat unstable.
He constructed a bed
He constructed a bed
Out of tree trunks and said,
"Even adders can multiply on a log table."
%
@ -5239,9 +5011,9 @@ That wears peckers down, limp and blunt!
%
When I was a baby, my penis
Was as white as the buttocks of Venus.
But now 'this as red
But now 'tis as red
As her nipples instead--
All because of the feminie genus!
All because of the feminine genus!
%
When they asked a pert baggage name Alice,
Who'd been bedded and banged in the palace,

2
games/fortune/datfiles/startrek.sp.ok
View File

@ -24,7 +24,7 @@ Gothos
Hag
Hedford
Hodin
Kank
Kang
Kanuto
Kelinda
Kelvan